June 1 – 15, 2001 Post Archive :: I Want a New Girlfriend

Friday June 15, 2001

Old News / Forums

Fuck Women! (12:00AM EST)Jack
The women in my life are really starting to piss me off. Tonight I was supposed to go out with this chick that I had met last week. She emailed me this morning and this is what I got in my inbox.


Yes, she does write in all capitals, but that’s beside the point. I emailed her back around 12 today and still no word from her. I’m sure shit could have gotten fouled up, but a fucking phone call would have been nice. Oh well, I can scratch her off the list of girls I want to bang.

Besides her there’s another girl that I met awhile ago. Since I was all bored and shit tonight I imed her to try and make plans. That was a no-go too. So it was another Friday night of me and my bag of Doritos. Did watch Fight Club again for the millionth time, so the night wasn’t a total loss.

You wanna know something funny? I’m on my own for the first time ever. Everytime I’ve moved out in the past I’ve been with friends, or at least sharing a house with other people. Now it’s just me and my basement room. There’s no woman to clean up after me, no mom to tell me to eat my veggies, it’s just me and the TV. In the next few months you’ll be able to tell how I’m doing by reading the site. Or the site might just kind of fade away. I’m not sure if I can balance house chores and updating this page everyday. We’ll get to that road it comes I guess.

Guess who should have another article tomorrow? That’s right, everyone’s favorite sexy bi-sexual chick, Aimee!The last time we heard from her, she was down in the Carolina’s somewhere picking up girls at the bar. As far as I know she’s writing her next article as I type this. Look for it tomorrow…

You know how Chimptopia has his theme days, such as Fantasy Friday? We’re going to have the same thing here, but it’s going to be a little different. The days of the week will be as follows….

Monday = Major Mellons
Tuesday = Tight Twats
Wednesday = Wet Women
Thursday = Tiny Tits
Friday = Fat Fannies
Saturday = Sexy Celebs

Sunday will be my day to find all the pictures for the week. So you look for that starting on this Monday coming up. If you have a suggestion for a day of the week, email me.

From: Daniel
Subject: An e-mail..
Hey Jack,

Love your site… blah blah blah, etc… (You know you’re site, you don’t need me to explain why it’s cool.)

I just thought I’d share with you my plans for the summer, because I noticed that one of your updates talked about you going back to the original philosophy of the site and my plans for the summer are kind of like that.

Myself and my friends have deemed this summer our “Reclaiming our Masculinity” summer. We want to do shit like fishing and camping and mountain biking and shit. This weekend we’re inner tubing down the truckee with a cooler of cold ones and spending the night in Reno. The idea is that when we were in High School we used to do a shitload of badass stuff like that, but when college kicked in, we just partied and drank and didn’t really do shit.

So that’s priority #1. The other reason for this summer is that women as a whole can be really boring. Sure their the best thing in bed, but to do actual activities and shit, nothing compares to another guy. (I trust you won’t take this the gay way.) So most of these activities this summer are strictly “No Girls Allowed.” Just some fucking time with the guys.

Anyway, I share this with you because you mention that you are really interested in getting into a real relationship, and I figure being comfortable with your friends and having some stupid stories to tell during the week about what you did during the weekend, is the best way of making yourself available to women. Of course no success for me yet this summer, but if it works, I’ll let you know.

That’s kinda what happened to me when I moved up here to Western MA. It’s tough to meet people when you’re new in the area and go to a community college. I’ve met a ton of girls while I’ve been here, but you’re totally right when you say they can be “boring.” I’m all down for hanging out with chicks when they’re polishing my knob, but when it comes time for shopping and shit you wont see me anywhere in sight. That’s why I’m going to join some clubs I think. Do some hiking, rollerblading, and other shit that I used to do everyweekend. Basically just meet some people and hopefully make some new friends. Does any one want to be my friend?

I’m gonna go smoke now. Why don’t you people use the forums? If you need advice or want to give it out, that is the place.

Thursday June 14, 2001

Old News / Forums

Crouching Tiger Hidden Jack(7:30PMEST)Jack
I finally get to see this movie tonight. I’m going to get some pizza rolls, a big bottle of coke, and just fucking enjoy this movie. There will be no disturbing me while that shit is on. But that’s not until later so what to talk about now. There’s no good AOL personals, Yahoo personals blow, and I haven’t gotten any super cool emails to post. Granted I haven’t checked my mail since 2 last night, so maybe later I’ll post some.

Probably the most popular question I get asked is how much money do I make off the site. To tell you the truth I really don’t get that much. It’s enough to maybe take a girl out for dinner once a month and get a case of beer on the weekends. If you’re interested click here. Ok enough with the cheap plugs for my wallet….

Tomb Raider comes out tomorrow, any movie with the broad Angelie Jolie gets my $18.00. I’m really looking forward to the Kevin Smith movie, but that’s a given. A.I. looks good and I’m sure I’ll waste money on the Jurassic Park movie when it rolls into theaters. Hey I just found out about this site and now it’s closing. Another victim of the dot-com disaster. Sometimes I wonder what would happen if my hosting disappeared. Would I start up again on some Geocities, or Angelfire page? Trying to reclaim the people who used to read, or just let the name go away? I’m not sure and for right now everything seems stable, but I guess you never know, right?

I’m becoming a writing hooker. I’ll be writing an article for Playtime Stuff when it comes back online, and I emailed the fine ladies over at Bad Ass Chick if I could do an article for them. I could do something about how nice guys finish last or how women know how to play us like the guitar. Or I could bust out some old school shit like when I was writing for college club. There were classics there, such as Being Friends with an Ugly Chick, and Why Fat Chicks shouldn’t wear Bikinis. They kicked me out when I said some things about them being bought out by Student Advantage. It’s the same shit over there now as it’s always been, nothing new.

Maybe If I put a dress on and throw on some makeup they’d put me in their web cam portals. I don’t think I’d go that far, but I wouldn’t mind shagging their advertising director. Hey baby wanna do some promotion for my site? I can’t pay you in cash, but maybe we can work a deal!?

This girl is right in Boston. I’m seriously going to have to make a little road trip out there soon. When I was still a little freshman in college me and few buddies visited a friend who was going to Bentley. He brought us to this pig roast and for the whole day we drank beers, smoked joints, and ate some good BBQ. On the bus ride home I was high as a kite and almost had some chick going down on me in the back of the bus. Those were the good old days when the girls swallowed the didn’t ask for much more than that.

Now if I’m lucky enough to get some chick in my bed she wants to cuddle and shit like that afterward. I figure that by letting her enjoy the comfort of my air mattress and sleep next to me, that, that should be enough. Ah, to be 18 again. All you kids that read this site and are still in high school, enjoy it while it lasts.

Old News / Forums

Requiem For a Dream (2:00AM EST)Jack
Is the best fucking movie I’ve seen in awhile. Drug movies seem to get to me for some reason. It’s not like I was a super drug user back in the day ( I did my share though ) but for some reason I can relate to them. This is one is by far the best that I’ve seen. Some of the movies just show the upside or just show the downside to using. This one shows the full circle of heavy drug use. I think any one who has used before knows that there is a good side, otherwise there would be no reason. But it’s the downside that really fucks with you. Luckily I never went that far down, but I know a bunch of people who did.

Damn it’s late night right now. But your good buddy Jack is far from tired. Tons of shit to talk about and tons of shit to post. Let’s start with a little reader mail.

From: Bill Brooks
Subject: Just a quick note
I emailed you months ago, when you mentioned something about Billy Joel on your webpage and it sounded so much like me I had to “give you props” as the l33t kids say.

Anyway, I’ve been checking out your site the last few months, and I like what you’ve been doing. I just wanted to shoot you a quick note to say keep up the good work. And if you ever find yourself in Seattle, shoot me an email and if I’m around I’ll buy you a beer.

Disclaimer: I know webmasters get crazy shit over email sometimes. I’m not gay or anything like that…just another single guy in his twenties that shares the frustration of not finding any decent girls that aren’t yet married or seriously involved.

Anyway, keep up the good work.

I never think any guy that emails me is a homo unless he sends me pics of his shriveled up schlong. It’s almost reassuring to me that there are other people in the same boat as me.

Deez Nutss: I love your site!
getnewgirlfriend: thanks
Deez Nutss: who’s this?

As much as I bitch about stupid ims, I really do like talking to the people who read the site. But really how stupid can one person be? There’s a link on the left hand side with a link to my AIM name. When you click on that link it brings up a window with “I love your site!” already written in it. So the person does have the oppurtunity to delete that and type something else in if they want.

Oh well enough bitching about stupid shit. Here’s some mail.

From: Linux Kitty
Subject: hey
what sexual favors do i have to do to get on the camportal? 😛


First you must take off all your clothes, but leave those high heels on. Then you must bend over and let me spank you at least 20 times. After I’m done spanking you will stand on one leg and jump up and down. After those simple tasks just send me an email with your cam image and URL for your site. That’s not just for you Linux, that goes for any semi decent cam girl. I got some empty spots and it’s time to fill them in.

Click Here!

Click there and fill out the form, you could the internet’s next celebrity!! If you don’t you’re a just a Geocities Douchebag. Let’s see what’s on the schedule for tomorrow.

9:00 AM – Wake up and roll out of bed. Go upstairs, cook some bacon, smoke a butt and have about 5 cups of coffee.

10:00 AM – Make a really quick update and check my email. Have to be out the door to mow some lawns in the morning.

12:00 PM – Get back from mowing, make some Geno’s Pizza Rolls, take a shower and probably a shit.

2:00 PM Thru 9:00 PM – Working Man.

9:01 PM – Try and figure out if I can get some broad over to my place. You know it gets a little chilly at night, so I need some one to keep me warm.

12:00AM – Hopefully have a good buzz going and ready to start knocking some boots!!

Yes that is a day in the life of Jack Sullivan. Not really as exciting as I make it out to be. Oh well I get by and survive….

Old News / Forums

The Clothing of the Depressed (1:00AM EST)Jack
Is sweatpants and a raincoat. After many hours on hold and talking with bird-brain tech support people, I have cable TV and cable internet back on. It’s amazing how much you miss the shit once it’s gone. But it’s back now and should be all set for me to doze off to.

I was right in the middle of watching RFAD when the DVD player crapped out. It kinda fucks up in hot weather and it needs a good break before it can play again. It’s a pretty good movie so far, lots of herion use, Jennifer Connely’s bush, and Marlon Wayans! How can you top that!

I was cruising through some website and they were talking about how American is becoming desensitized against sex and violence and other shit. And you know what? I’d have to say that they are right. I’ve seen a lot of shit, but the only thing I can’t really handle is the shit eating stuff. I dunno that just really gets to me. I think the DVD is working again. I’ll be back later.

Free LinksSolosierAssAssCrushworthyIWANGF Top 50

Also I’m working on making some prices for advertising on the site. It’s going to be extremely fair pricing so if you’re interested send me an email.

Wednesday June 13, 2001

Old News / Forums

Survivorer(7:00PM EST)Jack
Brand new contest coming up so submit your entry now to get into the action. I already applied but all of you should too. It looks like it’s going to be a pretty cool little thing. A lot of naked chicks will make it even better!!

I also set up a Free For All Links Page. That should solve the problem with people asking for a link. Just type in the title and your URL and it’s added instantly.

I noticed Solosier must get the same type of IMs that I do. He knows the pain that I suffer through each and every day.

Old News / Forums

Urban Legends (6:00PM EST)Jack
I’m going to Friendly’s and watching a movie so this will be the last update until really late tonight or maybe tomorrow morning. Maybe I’ll squeeze something in later, but don’t count on it.

Been getting into the whole Urban Legend thing again. I can still remembering that whole Pop Rocks and Coke while I was in high school. I was cruising through their message boards when I saw this.

And as for the person who mentioned puppets/marionettes, well I used to have a HORRIBLE fear of ventriliquist’s dummies. They are still a little unnerving to this day but when I was young the fear was unbelievable.Of course watching that one short horror film called “The Dummy” or something sure didn’t help. I didn’t sleep in my room that night.

I hate those ventriloquist dummies myself, and I know exactly what horror film he’s talking about. They used to play in between horror movies on the USA Network. When I was a little kid I didn’t sleep for weeks after watching that. Stupid thing to be afraid of, but back when I was a short fat kid that’s what I hated. I out grew that and now I’m just afraid of women with beards.

I guess a couple people thought I was pissed or something in my last post. I’m not really pissed I’m just appalled at how many retarded people there are in the world. Today I got like three hundred more ims from people asking for a link. I’m working on a free for all links page so that will be up soon.

Old News / Forums

Dog Park(3:30PM EST)Jack
Another beautiful summer day. I cruised into South Hadley for a little bit and hung out down at the commons. Checking out the Mount Holyoke chicks and just hanging out. Also got a couple movies at Blockbuster (Requiem For a Dream, and Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon.) Probably watch the Requiem one tonight and CTHD tomorrow morning. I heard a ton of good shit about the movie so it’s probably not a waste of money.

I’m so fucking hot right now that it’s not even funny. It’s like 90 and my balls are sweating something awful. Give me a pool, a margarita, and a babe in a bikini and I’d be happy right now.

Everytime I post that I don’t want people iming me for links I have to block a hundred more people. So for the last time do not ask me for a link. I have too many people to make everyone happy. Fill out the form on the link page or sign up for the Top 50. Other than that I can’t really help you out.

Old News / Forums

Back To The Old Jack (2:00AM EST)Jack
Fuck all the nice guy shit it’s time to go back to what this site used to be… A place to talk about relationships, look at porn and basically just have fun reading. It’s back to making three posts a day about random shit and having random sex with every girl that I meet. So like it or not that’s what it’s going to be. The ton of reader mail that I haven’t posted can be found here. Got a question, comment, or gripe about the site? Email me here. Wanna see some dude blow his load into a girl’s mouth? Click Here.

Now that all that shit is out of the way it’s time for the good stuff. Basically I’m totally single with no prospects in sight. Of course that’s when I normally find the best girls, when I’m not even looking for them. So hopefully something will come around that I can stick my dinky into. I’m usually pretty good about finding some broad during the summer months. Well, at least back home I was. During the summer months you didn’t want to get into anything too serious because the chick would probably be leaving in August anyways. But when the end of August is coming up, it’s good to find something you can fuck during the winter. If you don’t have anything lined up, it can be a cold lonely winter.


I never really noticed any real hot Asian chicks on the Cape. Sure there were a couple but nothing really that breathtaking. I’ve seen a couple around here, but I need an Asia Carrerra or Sung Hi Lee to really get my attention. There’s a couple on the web that I’ve seen, but none in WMass yet. If your a hot chick in Western Ma I’d love to hear from ya, so send an IM this way. Speaking of IM’s there’s a million ways to get in touch with me so don’t be afraid. I do block people and the conversations usually start out this way…

Hey dude I love your site! Can I get a link….
No dude you can’t get a link and I will probably never link you. If you want your link to be on this page sign up for IWANGF Top 50, or fill out the link request form.

What does eating a girl out taste like?
This is something I just can’t explain to any one. It’s normally the 12 year olds that come to this site who ask that classic question. I tell them there mom tasted like tuna and their sister tasted like cat food. Then they usually warn me a few times and then I block them. Here’s a classic email that I just got!

Hey Wanna Trade Porn?
Dude what are you like 13? The last time I traded porn I was 12 years old and had to give up my used copy of Hustler for a newer mag of Penthouse. The internet is full of porn, and if you can’t find it, I can’t help ya.

Hey Jack, Nice site. I’ll just get down to business. I’m looking to further show the world my site and am slowly looking for more affiliates. Now, my site has nothing to do with your site really – but I go to it frequently go to it – so I figured why not. I can’t promise a lot of hits – but then again, I’m not that widely known to the world. Hence my current project. I’m sure you get what I’m saying, eh?
Signed, Demented

I really hate when people use the word AFFILIATES. When I hear that I think of paychecks showing up in my PO Box, not me linking some peice of shit angelfire site. Well this cocksmoker didn’t even include his link, so I can’t really say I’ll never link him, but this is his email address – Dementia. Email him if you really want to see his website. Now here are some links I really like.

ArrogancySlapassBig Dark CloudCampus Rag

You should really check out Arrogancy. Last week he had a script for A.I. and there’s always interesting stuff to read. Plus he’s cool new redesign so that makes it worth the click too. Some other sites that I read everyday are SnowSurfer, Chimptopia, and the one from across the pond. You should check them all out, maybe you’ll learn something.

Hmm, while I was doing this update I finagled my way into meeting a girl tomorrow. I’m supposed to stop in her work so she can see if I’m scary or not. I don’t have to see her until like 12 so I should be able to pull it together. We’ll see what happens with that. At least I had the balls to tell her about the site… and she still talked to me afterward.

While I was on Cam tonight I remembered what I had to mention. Remember last week when I asked people to send me shit?

Jack Sullivan
PO Box 39
Granby, Ma 01033

Just in case you forgot, well a company actually sent me some pretty shit. It’s called Get a Gadget and they’re based out of Texas and mailed it to me priority. Here’s a list of the Free Shit they sent me.

Candoms – Practice safe sipping with these things. I guess they’re supposed to keep you’re drink cold, but if they were longer I’d use it as a real condom!

Bikini Lighters – They sent me like three of these things which was cool. The nipples light up and stuff! Very classy for use at the bar when you’re trying to light some girl’s smoke.

They also sent me some other cool stuff. Check out there site, it’s like a Spencer Gift’s type of place. Thanks again guys, that was wicked cool of you!

Monday June 11, 2001

Old News / Forums

I’m Back(12:00AM EST)Jack
It’s another Monday and I’m back from the dead. Weekends usually seem to take a lot out of me and I don’t know why. It’s not like I go out and party until 5 in the morning like I used to it’s just all the sitting around makes me lazy. I’m going to bed early tonight just so I can go to the gym tomorrow morning. I gotta back into shape, and I want to do it soon. I’m a fucking fat bastard who doesn’t do shit any more.

Speaking of not doing shit, the girl I went out with on Friday kind of blew me off. I called her last night like I was supposed and then she had to bail. She said she’d call me back, but never did. It’s not a total big deal, and I’m not really worried about it, but she was a cool chick. It’s like why can’t I just find some one who likes me and wants to be with me. I run this shitty fucking “relationship” website yet I can’t get into one myself.

Why is it that I can’t find a girl? It’s not for the lack of looking, because I view every girl as a prospect. I’m a picky bastard, but that’s beside the point. It’s not like I’m out there looking for the perfect girl, I just want some one who I can share shit with, tell stuff too, and all the other garbage that goes along with having a girlfriend. I like taking a girl out for dinner and shit, and it’s been a long enough time for me.

So this is my new plan. I’m not going to have random hookups any more. It’s all about serious committed relationships now. I’m sure most of you are saying “That’s a bunch of horseshit! Jack can’t stay faithfull.” But this is my chance to find something out there. I’m almost 23 years old and I’ve had one, maybe two meaningful relationships. It’s time for me to look for something more out there. Find something worthwhile, because not that random sex with multiple women is bad, it’s just I need something more now. Does that mean I’m going to be celibate for the next year? Probably, cause it’s been that long since I had any type of real relationship.

So now you’re all saying Jack is pussying out. Hey maybe I am, but I got to do what I got to do. This could all change if some Playboy bunny wants a night of passion with me, so I think I’ll give in to that. I’m going to post some later on, but for now that’s it. I’ve got cable service back and I PROMISE I’ll post all the links tonight. Send me some email if you’re bored.

Has Nay Dissed You? Click Here!!

Saturday June 9, 2001

Old News / Forums

Brewery(5:00PM EST)Jack
So I’m finally posting after 24 hours. I haven’t slacked this much on this site since I first started. I guess that’s what happens when you start to have a life. So me and my date went the Northampton Brewery, a cool little restaurant. It was like an hour and a half wait but that gave us time to walk around Noho and just hang out. So we had a few drinks, some laughs, and a good time. This could be a chick that I would see again.

Other than not too much new going on. Cable modem service should be back on tonight, some dude from the office should be coming over between 7 and 9. Which means I’ll be sitting on my ass waiting for this fool to show up. Of course I’ll wait because the dial-up doesn’t feed my internet addiction like the cable modem.

I’ve decided to expand on the aol personals that I post. I’ll add all the girls that are on my list and try and set myself up on a date with them. Then I’ll post the conversations here!

AOL Personal Day

100% Boricua Lady – Just the title of this chick’s personal confused me. What the hell is a Boricua?! I suppose it’s some kind of island down south where the girls don’t look that good. Let’s dig a little deeper into the personal though, shall we? Some how this chick makes 50,000 as a cashier! I gotta find out which store she’s working at.

Cool Rock Chick – I’m not sure about this girl. She could have a banging tight body but I can’t tell with the picture she’s got. Her taste is kinda like mine, and she seems like she’s pretty smart… We’ll see what happens when I im her when she comes on.

Better in Person!! – Well yeah, I hope you’re better in person…. Just at the fucking bangs on this broad! I feel bad ranking on this chick cause she seems like a sweet girl who just wants to find some one to spend time with. Yes, I do have a heart.

How many of you think I’ve gotten softer since doing this site? I probably have a little bit, but I don’t think too much. There’s still porn, cheating stories, and all the other shit that’s been here since the beginning. Maybe a little less porn, but this isn’t really a porn site so it’s all good.

Friday June 8, 2001

Old News / Forums

Cool Shit(5:00PM EST)Jack
Cool shit going on today. I’m just about to take out this girl to dinner so that should go pretty well. We were talking on the phone for awhile last night and she thinks I’m pretty funny. I’ll update about what we did tomorrow morning if all things go well. Updates have been a little slow lately because Media One has decided to make my cable modem not work. Should be fixed tomorrow along with the premium channels on the TV. This cable shit is great when it works, but it goes down it’s all fucked up.

Here’s a pretty cool email from Melissa. She offers her take on my site and internet dating in general. It’s always good to get emails from the ladies, they offer so much insight! Well basically they just confuse me, but that’s beside the point.

From: Peter
i not sure why i’m writing but i need some advices on ex’s. i’m almost positive that i have one of the worst ex’s in the world, she had the nerve to say she loved me and cheat. so we eventually broke up and she started dating some dude and rub in my face that she was happier with him then she could of been with me. every chance she could she would make me feel better be nice to me then out of no where perpously say something bad about me that the new boy friend does better. wtf is that shit? it don’t matter i was a sucker and kept coming back for more. now i’m free shes dead to me basically but shes still going at it. we stoppoed talking for a month or 2 and shes talks bad of me and harrasses my freinds and does totaly outragous things to me. seriously if she was over me like she claims wouldn’t she stop fucking around? i left her alone how the hell am i sopposed to get her to chill?

Dude she’s totally not over you. I had this girlfriend that I broke up with and then basically stopped talking to for over a month. During this time she changed her profile a million times and stalked my friends. I finally confronted her about it and was she was like “I just wanted to get your attention, because I still love you..” If she was totally over you she would just leave you alone. Giver her some time and you should be all set.

From: Charlie
Subject: Interracial Dating
Just to comment on your subject of interracial dating. I personally have never dated a person of “my color”, please note I am asian. Growing up as an army brat, my friends were of all different nationalities. So, I never grew up with color prejudices and my parents never mentioned anything about skin color as all their friends were again of different races.

Dating was always with caucasion women. I believe, because they were the only type of women I actually ended up seeing a lot of. The few asian women that I was interested in, were more interested in the type of car I drove and how much money was in my back account. Just my luck, huh.

Now that I’m older and married to wonderful woman (caucasion), I still don’t look at skin color as I do with what’s going on with the inside of a person. I do have two beautiful girls, who have friends of different nationalities. And when it comes time for them to date I will not bring up skin color since they are after all a mixture of 5 different races. But if I feel that the person they date has the wrong morals or might endanger either of them in any way, then I will voice my opinion.

My friends are again, of different color. I guess for me, it’s just what you’re upbringing is and what you were taught. Because we aren’t born being prejudice.

I think every one is a little predujiced. If you break down the word is actually means “pre-judge” which everyone does without even thinking about it. It’s a little bit different when it comes to make a judgement based on some one’s skin color. Hopefully sometime in the future we’ll be living in a more tolerant age.

So who should I use for the next webcam battles? Here’s a good one sent into me by Fragile Sin.

Coming Soon – Fragile Sin vs. Amazon Bitch

Charismavs. Melany

Yep so you’ll be able to look forward to all those matches coming soon. There will be a lot more updates as soon as my modem is working again. For now you should check out the site Cali310. He started out in number 7 on IWANGF Top 50, but now he’s running second place behind that asshole Jack. Sign up and see if you can knock him off the top spot!

Thursday June 7, 2001

Old News / Forums

The Game(6:00PM EST) Jack
I watched “The Game” last night on the ghetto cable that I have now. There’s no pay stations, just basic channels and the Game Show Network. You know I kind of wish something like that would happen to me. Maybe put a little excitement back in my life. I guess there’s some new video game coming out where it’s a little like that. Should be pretty cool.

Speaking of games, isn’t life just one long game? There’s no real goal to life, but there are certain objectives. Get an education, get a good job, get a hot wife. We all strive for the same things in life, but what happens to the people who get a little lost along the way? You know the one’s I’m talking about, they’re on Cops every weekday night. Is it just because of a lack of drive? Motivation? Or is it something else that makes people content living in a trailer and banging some toothless broad? That’s the shit I think about night.

Enough of the stupid shit, how bout some fun stuff? I’ve been talking with this chick in Westfield lately, so that’s pretty cool. Maybe if I don’t totally fuck it up I can make something work with this. The webcam girl fights are pretty cool to do and they don’t seem to be pissing to many people off. Well the people who win aren’t pissed.

From: Vilette
Subject: !
Hey nice battle write up lol. I like that frostylips girl; she actually msged me on AIM once and was pretty nice. She’s the kind of girl I could just watch all day, she has some charisma.
I do have a club:
It’ only has 1800 something people in it and there’s no naked pictures in it, because they don’t allow it for the catergory I chose.
Anyway, thanks! I always like when you got nice words for me 🙂 I’ll have to give you some images when I remember.

Always good to get a little positive feedback about shit. I’m bored so I’m going to write about the must see movie this summer. Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back… the latest creation from the person who brought you Mallrats, Clerks, Chasing Amy and Dogma. This last film is supposed to wrap up everything from the Jersey trilogy. I still remember the first time I saw Clerks, as I was working as a busboy in this tourist Italian restaurant. We used to have some of the dumbest people come in and we made a ‘Clerks’ style movie about it. We didn’t get the fame and fortune that Kevin Smith did, but it was pretty classy. I think I’m going to have to watch Chasing Amy again tonight.

I want some free shit! Do you have a product that you want to get a little exposure? Then send me a T-shirt and I’ll plug the hell out of you. Also I want some cool real mail to read over the summer. So send shit to this address.

Jack Sullivan
PO Box 39
Granby MA, 01033

How bout some international T-shirts? Send me some cool beer shirts from Italy. Or some crap from Ireland. I just want stuff! And that will be the last of the shameless asking for shit because I run a website.

Hmm, now what else to talk about. The weekend is almost here so that means a lot more relaxing and drinking for me. I actually might get my drink on tonight, we’ll see though. Last night was kind of a rough one, so I might just take it easy. That is unless Westfield girl wants to jump my bones.

Wednesday June 6, 2001

Old News / Forums

Fast and the Furious(9:00PM EST)Jack
Sometimes I hate it when I’m right. When I went to the see the Mummy a couple weeks ago there was a preview for the Fast and the Furious. I was watching the preview for the movie and thought it looked pretty cool. That was until I realized it was going to be another one of those “cop goes undercover to break up drug ring” movies. That was cool the first time I saw when it was called Point Break, or Stone Cold, or that really bad one with Chuck Sheen. Why can’t they just make a cool car racing movie, and no that one with Sylvester Stallone doesn’t count. I’ll still probably go see it, only because the hot chick from The Faculty is in it.

Got two new ladies added to the cam pages. They’re over in Portal Number 9. I’ll also be adding all the links that were emailed over to me. Don’t think I forgot about ya. Check back those later tonight after I get something to eat.


Have you ever been drunk at college? I remember spending my entire first year at AIC drunk in class. I was only 17 when I went there so it’s not like I was totally mature. (Not like I’m super mature now either) I used to buy a 30 pack on Thursday nights, finish it on Saturday, and then buy another one for the football game on Sundays. Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, is what the dean would say to me every time I ended up in his office. But that only lasted a year and now here I am…

I’m supposed to call this chick in Westfield tonight to maybe make plans with her. I showed her my picture and I guess she thought I was pretty cute or whatever. I’ve seen a couple of pictures of her and she’s not that bad. What the hell do I say to this chick though. Hi! my name’s Jack and run this website. You might want to check it out, cause if things go well with us, I’ll be writing about you on a daily basis! I bet even if I could find a girl that doesn’t mind the site, she’d be a little intimidated about being written about everyday. Am I better off not telling the girl, or just find one that doesn’t care? If I don’t tell her it’s kind of like lying to her right from that start, which is something I really don’t want to do. But if I’m honest and loss some good girl because of this retarded site, is it worth it? These are the questions that keep me up till 5 in the morning, well that and Skinemax.

Speaking of cable TV, my cable modem and cable TV both went out last night. I come home from going out to eat and my cable box says L-01. So I’m looking at the thing like WTF? and finally decide to call the cable place. They gave me some BS about doing a global something or other and said it should be all set in a half hour. Well it’s now 9 o’clock and I’m using my trusty dial-up access.

Violet vs. Frostylips

Wow, number 2 of the Webmisstress fights. Just remember this is just for fun so don’t get too pissed. I’m also going to post all the interviews tonight at midnight. Look for that too. It’s dinner time so I’ll catch you all later!

Old News / Forums

It’s Playtime (1:00AM EST)Jack
So I just got back from dinner with Ask Ashley and her friend. I drank a few beers had a few laughs and a pretty good time. It’s cool to put a face to the people who run websites, you know like meet the actual person behind the articles. She writes sex advice for them and she does it well. Check out her writings, you’ll probably learn a thing or two. I tried to get her to come back to my place, but the charm just wasn’t working tonight I guess.

Well the free for all links thing has been a success. If not just in the amount of links, but in showing me some of the other people that read this site. Maybe they don’t really read it, but took the time out of their day to fill out the form.

Smartest Man on the Web – Cool looking site with articles and tons of other stuff. I never know what to write about other sites, so just check it out.

Rex Mag – Here’s their description…. “Online Men’s Entertainment Magazine – mostly sex stuff!” Sounds like Maxim….

Those two sites both filled out the form, but I think they’re worthy for front page linkage. So check them out and stuff. Yeah I’m tired. More later on if I have something worthy to post.

Tuesday June 5, 2001

Old News / Forums

Douche Bags(9:00PM EST)Jack
What part of “If you want a link click on the link page and fill out the form” don’t you understand? I update it pretty often so chances are your link will be up on the same day. I don’t want any more emails like this one.

Hey i’m starting a new site called Boring Man, it’s an e/n site of my bullshit. I really like your site, and I was wondering if you could maybe link me or plug me onto your page to help me get some traffic going. Would you be willing to help a new webmaster out? Let me know…

Fill out the LINK FORM…. I might not even link this guy cause he’s such a fucker. I don’t want to be an asshole, but if you can’t read, you probably don’t deserve a link.

In other random news, I’ll be leaving my house tonight, and I will be actually conversing with other human beings. I know it’s a shock to all of you, but I probably should see what this outside world is. Maybe I’ll write a little update when I get back. Probably not, but you never know. It’s not really a date or anything, but just a little get together. I can’t remember the last time I went on an actual date. It was probably a couple girlfriends ago. We went out for the standard of dinner and a movie, then a late night trip to Skinner mountain. Back home when I was on the Cape, all my dates ended with a trip to the beach. My beach of choice was always Nauset cause you could park the car and take a nice long walk into the dunes. Up here there’s only woods. Trees and leaves are a poor substitute for the ocean and dunes. I’ll have to make due with what I’ve got though.

I’m still looking to fill some portal spots. So if you’re a chick with a web cam send me an email. There’s like 6 spots open now so you’re almost guaranteed a spot on the page. If you take naked pictures for me you will totally get a spot!!


Yes, cheap self promotion never hurt anyone. I’ve got to figure out some new stuff for the site and I think I know what is. Daign has the market on Webcam Girl Reviews, but how bout a web cam girl comparison? You know like pit two popular web cam girls against each other and see who comes out the victor. The sections I’ve come up with so far are.

1. Design of Site: I like sites that look good. If it’s flashy and gets my attention then you’ll win this section.

2. How hot is the girl?: I’ll judge looks, boobs, and overall appearance in this category.

3. Writing style: What’s the content of the site like and so forth…

There will be some other random shit that I’ll come up with along the way. So in the first of hopefully many I bring you…

Nay vs. Chelle

These are just my random opinions, so don’t get too bitter if you lose. You can always just trash me on your site. Also if you have any matches that you think I should post just send them in.

Monday June 4, 2001

Old News / Forums

Today Is Anti-Jack Day (11:00PM EST)Jack
Found a bunch of websites talking smack today, and one even signed up for the Top 50 list. How gay is that? If a trash talk some one, the last thing I’ll do is sign up on their list. Here’s some of my favorite ones.

Let’s play a quick game, and see if you can guess who I’m talking about:
He’s slowly attempting to turn himself into Stile.
The majority of his content is soft porn.
He’s slightly funnier than prostate cancer.
He writes on approximately a 5th grade level.
That’s right, its Jack from I Want A New Girlfriend! Perhaps the least entertaining entertainment site ever, and now, you can vote for EE on IWANGF’s top 50 sites. Hell, publicity is publicity, so if you’ve got a second, click on the link below.

I think he’s just bitter, kinda like this person. But he does bring up a valid point. Is this site becoming the Stile Project? I kinda hope not, not because of my lack of respect for Stile and what he does, but because I see myself as original. Sure, the Top 50 sites was insipred by his, but I like to think that he does his own thing and I do mine. If you feel differently, or just want to comment, send me an email.

Some of you have been wondering why I have a IWANGF button manipulated with a link to GayNetwork.com. Well, if I must reiterate myself once more for the memory-deprived, I hate Jack. I hate IWANGF. Why is such a shithole so revered by thousands of web goers daily? To hell with him. Jack is the epitome….

That last comment was posted by the fine fellows over at Peach Stapler. They actually have a great site and I wasn’t sure why he was so pissed at me until he sent me an email.

From: Peachstapler
Subject: being sore
I’m not one to hold grudges, but usually when folks promise something, they follow through.

Once upon a time, we promised each other reciprical links (that means you and I both link each other). Only weeks later when I asked you why you hadn’t returned the favor, like a fat ex-girlfriend, you acted like you never even knew me. That cut me deep, pal.

Now, I am bitter. Like I said, I’m not one to hold grudges, in fact, it’s something I’d rather not do.

But since you were so bold to email me, I’m responding in my utmost sincerity.

Oops.. Well go check out their site, it’s really not that bad. So I think the only way to settle this whole bitter because you weren’t linked is to expand the links page. I’m going to set up a simple form and let you people email in your links. No more asking me on AIM, no more emails asking for a favor. If you want hits sign up on the Top 50 sites or fill out the form on the links page. I wanna help you out cause I don’t want to be known as the douche bag who never links sites. This should put an end to the debate. Now for some people who deserve links.

RatatakHoly ZooSticky KeysSnowsurferThe Campus Rag

Little Effect

If you’ve noticed (or maybe not) most of the images are now located here. A – F is posted now and I’ll start putting up the rest as time goes on. That doesn’t mean that there wont be anymore pictures on the main page, it just means the majority will be posted there.

And finally for right now, if you’re the girl I was talking to earlier (you know who you are) I lost your number, so give me a call if you want to talk some more. It doesn’t matter how late….. Peace out and I’ll be back in a few.

Old News / Forums

Another Monday (12:00AM EST)Jack
Wow another weeks starts up, it feels like it should be Friday. Maybe that’s because all my days just blend together recently. Summer is just about here and there’s never been a better time for me to turn over a new leaf. Time to start eating better, banging hotter girls, and cut down on the smoking. I’d be happy if I could just bang hotter girls though. This summer shouldn’t be that bad of one though. Might take a couple road trips and see some new places.

Sunday was filled by watching a bunch of bad movies on TV. Pumpkinhead was on, and that was probably the best thing that I watched. Sounds exciting huh? It’s been raining cats and fucking dogs so there wasn’t much more I could do. Another that I’ve been killing time on is Netmeeting. There’s this hot chick that likes to flash for me. You should see the rack on this broad.. Titties I could just suck on all night long. I might even go down to meet her and introduce her to little Jack. I’ll make sure and get plenty of pics if I do.

I Want a New Girlfriend Top 50 Sites!

Iplaying with that Top 50 Sites thing all day today. I like it a lot better than the free one, so check it out and sign up. I’ll come up with a button you can use soon, but for now you can use any one of those over on the left hand side. There’s only a few sites signed up right now, so if you jump on early your site can be pretty high up there.

I got a lot of email about the posting of porn and the posting of more articles. You can read it all here. Keep the comments coming cause I love to hear from you all. I do the site mostly for all you people who read it, so tell me what you want more of! One thing I’ve been slacking on is the interviews. Here’s a few more to keep you entertained.

Green Fairy – Not just your average E / N site. There’s awesome articles, stories and tons of other shit. Click here to read her interview.

Wondergirl – This chick is going to coming to Western Main August so that’ll be pretty cool. Maybe she’ll want to hang out with me! Click here for her interview.

Dawn Marie – I’ve always liked Dawn Marie, just because she has a good sense of humor. I kind of trashed her the first time I linked her, but we have a mutual appreaciation for each other. Click here for her interview.

There’s three for you. I’ll post the rest as the days go on. This should be a more fun filled week for me, so there will be plenty of shit to talk about. I’ve got some dates lined from Adult Friend Finder. And those usually turn out pretty good. I think I want to look for something a little more stable though. I see all these people with healthy comfortable relationships and I almost get a little jealous. As cool as random sex with hot chicks is, I eventually want to get something more. All my cousins are now married, and I’m the next in line. I think I’ll probably wait till I’m at least 30. So ifI meet my chick when I’m like 25 that gives me a few years to make sure she’s the one. The last thing I want to do is meet some broad, marry her, and then have her take away half my fortune. It doesn’t really matter that my fortune is about $50, because I worked really hard for that 50!

Yeah, click on that banner. It brings you to a really well put together site, much better than mine. Just look at the chick slapping her ass! It doesn’t get much better than that. Unless it was some really hot blonde chick slapping the other chicks ass, then it would be a little better. Here’s some other links I like a lot.

Stile ProjectClass or Sex? – Whatever Dude – Chimptopia – Holy Zoo –

I read those sites on a daily basis, and if you don’t you should really start. All of them are full of high quality writing and Stile has sick pictures to keep you happy.

Saturday June 2, 2001

Old News / Forums

IWANGF Top 50 (3:35PM EST)Jack
I set a really BASIC Top 50 list for you people to sign up for. It’s the free version but if you like it and sign up I’ll upgrade to the full version.

Click Here For the IWANGF Top 50

Old News / Forums

This is Not a Porn Site (2:00PM EST)Jack
Just got this in my inbox.

From: mic3||3^^
Subject: some stuff
hey jack… firstly,, i would like to say.. your site… rox man!!!

BUTT!!! recently it’s is really becomin a porno pics site… i mean, if i had really wanted to see some porno, i would have went to visit some porno site, and get real pornos frm a better server,,, the main reason why i visit your site in the first place, is to know more about you!!! and not pornos

if you wanna post pornos,, why don’t you make another link on your site wehre you post just porno pics and stuff,, and keep the main page totally about you and what you do and your past stuff and all… it’d attract more new ppl to your site… and besides… the domain is www.iWANTanewgirlfriend.com NOT www.thisisapornopicsite.net

Good email dude! How do people feel about that though? I like to think that people come here to read what I have to write, and not just for the pictures. I wouldn’t mind throwing some of the pics on a seperate page like Steak and Cheese does. Send me some email about how you feel.

Old News / Forums

The War on Drugs (1:00PM EST)Jack
Watched Traffic again last night, I fucking love that movie. The whole war on drugs thing kind of pisses me off though. This country is doing things so ass backward that we’ve already lost this so-called war. I my opinion the only way to stop this thing is to start at home. If people still want to use drugs people will continue to ship them in. I have nothing against people that use recreational drugs and use them responsibly. If alcohol is still legal, I don’t see why some one can’t puff a joint to relax.

Ok, enough of my little talk on drugs. If you use them cool, if you don’t that’s cool too.

From: Bill Mingo
Hey Jack,

Just browsin around and thought I’d Share a thought. What about a confessions section for your Site. Guys and Galz could air their dirty laundry anonymously. And hey……..what ever happened to that girl you were thinkin on letting write for IWANGF? I am here reading your wits everyday and actually look forward to it. Anyway what happened to her……she posted like…..once and that was it. Keep up the good work!!

Hey that’s a pretty good idea. So if any of you ladies out there want to write about your lesbian experiences send them in! As for Aimee, I don’t know what happened to her. See just drop off the face of the planet. If you’re still out there reading, send an email babe. People want to hear more of your stories!

So now I’ll thank a couple of people who have linked me recently.

Nail Bytes – I forget how I found out about this site, but I filled out one of their free for all links thing and all of a sudden they linked me on their main page. Sent a shitload of hits also. So check them out for some of the best links on the net.

Crushworthy – Another hot chick on the internet. Where were these girls when I was in high school? All the pretty girls were either playing volleyball or getting high behind the gymnasium. Not making websites with their cleavage hanging out.

Those three buddy icons were made by the guy who runs Die Pig. Check out his awesome site. I’ll be back later on with some more stuff for you!

Old News / Forums

Tons of Pics! (1:00AM EST)Jack
This post is all about pictures I’ve got a ton of them I need to post so here they all are.

80 Pictures of SkyBreast TortureMouse TrapMouse Trap



* – GrannyGrannyGrannyGrannyGrannyGranny – *




Ok I’m tired now, so maybe some more in a little bit if my fingers don’t fall off. I have to give a couple of plugs.

Die Pig – This cool cat has made me three aol buddy icons. Besides being cool as hell they crack me up. Check out his site for fan pics, naked chicks, and just cool shit in general.

.drew – Another cool cat with an awesome site. So check that shit out yo!

And Click Here For Some More Porn Sites

Friday June 1, 2001

Old News / Forums

Jack is Back (11:00PM EST)Jack
Pizza, the food from the gods. I could live off of it I’m sure. So let’s see, what do I want to talk about tonight? I could tell you about my run-in with the police as I was driving to Block Buster. I went there to pick up a couple of movies (Tao of Steve, Traffic) and decided to go a different way home than usual. I’m going alone at a good pace and get fucking pulled over by a South Hadley cop. He gives me the whole lecture about speeding and kids and shit like that, but luckily gives me a verbal warning.

I always seem to get in trouble when I do shit like that. When I was a sophomore me and my buddies were getting out of class and decided to take a different way back to our houses. Well, we got back to Route 6A and were headed home when this car pulled out right in front of us. My buddy who was driving could either swerve lift into oncoming traffic, or go right towards the curb. We hit the curb and go flying, the Jeep flipped over two times and we went into a traffic light and one of those boxes. When I opened my eyes I felt this pressure on my shoulder, thinking it was just one my buddies I yelled for them to get off me, but it was actually the windshield of the Jeep. So everyone is scrambling out of the car and here I am stuck in the fucking thing. They had to bust out the air bags and lift the Jeep off me before they could pull me out. What a fun time that was!

So you would think I’d learn my lesson, but I guess not yet. Hmm, there was some other things I wanted to talk about, but I totally forget now. I’ll just look through some viewer mail.

From: Charles
Subject: How I Found Your Site
Hey Jack, Thought I would drop you a line to say thanks for all the hours of great entertainment.. I have spread the word of your great site to many of people.. I think that is it great how you can be so open on your website and not hold back because of all the douche bags in this world. My actual main purpose for writing you is to tell you about a past experience of a money grubbing girlfriend who I thought just didn’t know any better. Anyways it starts off that we were dating for about 3 months with the usual (in most cases) great sex. All of a sudden I noticed a lack of enthusiasm or input in anything that we did. I thought it was something that I did wrong (obvious thing to think) anyways I asked her and she said nothing was wrong. I was really dumb in letting it continue for over a month but hey we all know what its like when you think you are in love and all the shit togo with it. When one days she calls me up and asks if I could go see her. It was cool with me seeing as how she had never really be pushy about the fact that she really really wanted to see me… I knew something was wrong from the moment that she got in the car because she never said a work for an hour or more til I said well I am going to drop you back home and when you feel like talking or anything please call me. To get to the short ending of the story she emailed me early in the morning just as I was getting to work I opened up my email and started reading all this crap about she needing space and the old line “Its not you its me”.. I was slightly pissed opening a new web browser and typed “www.iwantanewgirlfriend.com” And to my amazement up it came. Thanks for your great site man

~ Charles

I still remember the night my long time girlfriend broke up with me. She would usually come over and we’d have good sex, go out to eat, come back and have sex again. I knew something was up this night when she barely gave me a kiss when I saw her. She takes me on this drive down to the beach where she gives me the whole speech. “It’s not you it’s me” came up many times. So the whole times she’s crying and I’m being a total asshole, but what was I supposed to do? So she drops me off back home and I make some stupid comment as I’m getting out her car and she speeds off. Probably the most fucked up part was that after she dropped me off I went out to get wasted with some friends. But here’s the shitty part… Something was wrong with my phone that night and whoever tried calling would just get a busy signal. So after she dropped me off she tried calling a million times. I think to try and work something out. But I never got her call, and the rest is hostory. We have spoken off and on but it’s not the same anymore. I guess somewheer deep down I’m still kind of love her, but that’s far in my past so I have to let that shit go.

I have to fuck around with my cable modem, so as soon as I get that figured out, I’ll post some pretty pictures. While you’re waiting click on these links.

Loaded AgainNail BytesA Hot ChickTons of Naked Girls

Old News / Forums

Love Stinks (8:00PM EST)Jack
I just got done watching the best movie. It was Love Stinks, some small budget romantic comedy. It had the guy from Third Rock on the Sun, Bill Bellamy and my future wife Brigette Wilson. If you haven’t seen it yet it’s probably on HBO everyday so check it out. You seriously wont be disapointed. It tells the story about when every man has faced or probably will face in the near future. How women trick us into relationships and marriage. I don’t want to spoil the movie for you so just take my word on it.

I was going to update last night but I got caught up in seeing some chicks boobs. I’ll sure you’ll forgive me. I had this chick on Netmeeting (helping dorks like me see naked chicks since whenever Microsoft invented it.) So yeah I was on that thing till late night. The chick was fucking hot though so it was worth it. Nothing else new for me though. Tonight I’ll pick up a six-pack, some pizza, and veg out like it’s going out of style. This is my time to relax and I’m going to take full advantage of it. If you wanna get naked for me, just send an IM.

I was going to do the first of my bad Skinemax movie reviews today, but nothing was on last night. The only thing on was Eyes Wide Shut again and Idle Hands. IH was alright just for the fact that Jessica Alba was in it, and I had seen EWS many many times. So it’s pointless to do a review on those two. Tonight isn’t looking that much better though, the TV guide thing only goes up till 12, and Eyes Wide Shut is on again! Sorry for the quick post but the pizza guy is here. I’ll be back in a few!

Girls, porn, dirty pictures, sex, fucking, and more

| FREE IWANG XXX Galleries | Random XXX Site | Buy This Site |

I Hate Super Cuts (12:00AM EST) Jack
Yet I keep going back to them for haircuts… While me and Monica weregoing out, she cut my hair so I didn’t have to pay to get butchered every coupleof months. The other day I notice that my hair is getting pretty shaggy, andit’s about time for a trim. One thing I do love about getting my haircut is thefeeling of some hot broad running her fingers through my hair. I would totallysay that my bigger head is an erogenous zone, and anytime a hot Asianhairdresser is fondling me, I find it hard not to pitch a tent under that thingthey throw on you.

In other boring news I got all my shit together for school and afterSeptember 1st, I will officially have no life at all. Don’t expect too manyposts cause my second home will now be the classrooms over at STCC. I’ll begoing to school Mon thru Thursday taking some of the most boring classes ever.Also the chances of any of these classes having a single girl that is somewhatdoable are slim to fucking none. I guess It’ll all be worth it when I graduateMagna Cum Laude on� some broads titties

Driving down a countryroad, a man sees a sign for “St. Mary’s Brothel and Convent.” Hechuckles, and keeps going. But after seeing a few more signs, he realizes he hasto know what goes on at a whorehouse run by nuns. So he takes the turn, andparks. Welcomed inside, a nun greets him.
“I’m Sister Superior of St. Mary’s Holy Brothel and Convent. Are you interestedin our services?”
The man is a little flustered, but chokes out that he would indeed…but whatexactly can he get?
She replies, just loud enough to be heard “It’s $100 to be fucked.”
The man quickly goes to his wallet…because how often does one get to sleepwith a nun for a hundred bucks. The money in hand, the sister superior leads himup down a few hallways, covered in pictures of Christ, and Mother Mary, and thelike. She gets to a hall with a few rooms on each side, and asks what kind ofgirl he would like.
“Right this way,” she replies, and ushers him to the last door.
As he goes through the door, she shoves him, and he falls off the back steps ofthe building. As he picks himself up, he hears the door slam and lock. Hescreams for her to let him back in until he’s blue in the mouth. As he finallyturns around, he sees a sign:
“You’ve been fucked by St. Mary’s Brothel and Convent!”

Sometimes when I’m bored Itake a nice little walk through the park… Some days I flirt with the girlswalking their dogs and other times I catch something like this!

A man walks into a bar and sits down for a drink. The womansitting next to him couldn’t help but notice the sad look on his face as heorders a drink. She proceeds to ask him “What’s wrong”
“My wife left me,” the man replies.
“Oh, that is so sad, I am sorry to here that,” says the woman.”Why did she leave you?”
“Well, to be honest, she said that I was too kinky.”
The woman then says “Well, you won’t believe this, but just last year myhusband left me, for the very same reason. What do you say we finish thesedrinks, head back to my place, and see what happens?”
The man agrees, And when they get back to her place, she tells him to makehimself comfortable and proceeds to the bedroom. She decides to make the best ofit, and pulls out her finest kinky outfit. Black leather boots that go to herknees. Crotch less panties, and a bustier in black patent leather. A spikedcollar and long black gloves. She ties her hair back in a tight pony tail, grabsher whip and heads for the door.
As she walks out she sees the man just opening the door to leave. “Whereare you going?” she asks. “I thought we were going to have somefun.”
The man replies , “I already fucked your dog and shit in your purse. I’mout of here.”

A blonde isroller-skating down the board-walk one day. She’s just skating along in herlycra shorts, smiling at everyone, listening to her Walkman. She decides thatshe really needs a haircut.
She skates into the first salon she sees and goes up to the hairdresser andsays, “I need a haircut.” The hairdresser checks her out and says,”OK, sit down and take off your headphones.”
“No way!” shouts the blonde, “If I take off my headphones, I’lldie!”
“Then I can’t give you a haircut,” replies the hairdresser.
So the blonde gets up and leaves and skates further down the board-walk. Shesees another salon, goes in, and says to the hairdresser, “I need ahaircut… but you can’t take off my headphones or I’ll die!”
The hairdresser looks at her a little weird, but says, “OK, no problem.Have a seat.” So the blonde sits down and the hairdresser comes up behindher, and when she isn’t looking, he rips the headphones off her head.
Suddenly the blonde starts choking, and soon turns blue in the face, then keelsover and dies right there in the salon chair.
The hairdresser is a little freaked by this. He leans over and cautiouslylistens into the blonde’s headphones and he hears…
“Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out…”

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Here’s a list of sexual positionsthat I came across…..

Anal Boot [n] When you takea pitcher of beer, everyone spits in it, someone stirs it with their cock andthen the mixture is poured through the crack of a man ass into the waiting mouthof the loser of a bet or Drinking game.
Australian Death Grip [n] The act of grabbing a woman by thehaunches/crotch and staring deeply into her eyes until you’re slapped or kissed.A recommended tactic for very crowded bars. Another great opportunity forwagering among friends.
Ball Sacking [v] stretching of the scrotum over the face of someonesleeping or passed out, having a picture taken and posting it on the internetBeef Curtain [n] The shanked out remains of the labia after being stretched likePlay-doh for an hour or so of jimmy-jam (aka Beef Drapes, Meat Tarp, PissFlappers, Quim Nuts, Vertical Bacon Sandwich).

Clickhere for the rest of the list!

An extremely shy and very modestman was in the hospital for a series of tests, the last of which had left hisdigestive system upset.
Upon making several false-alarm trips to the bathroom, he decided that thelatest was another false alarm, so he stayed put in his bed. He suddenly filledhis bed with diarrhea and was embarrassed beyond his ability to remain rational.
Losing his presence of mind, he jumped up, gathered up the bed sheets, and threwthem out the hospital window.
A drunk was walking by the hospital when the sheets landed on him. He startedyelling, cursing, and swinging his arms wildly, which left the soiled sheets ina tangled pile at his feet.
As the drunk stood there staring down at the sheets, a security guard who hadwatched the whole incident walked up and asked, “What was that allabout?” Still staring down at his feet, the drunk replied: “I think Ijust beat the shit out of a ghost”

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington(Huskies) chemistry midterm. The answer was so “profound” that the professorshared it with colleagues, which is why we now have the pleasure of enjoying itas well.
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbsheat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle’s Law, (gas coolsoff when it expands and heats up when it is compressed) or some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing with time. So we need toknow the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they areleaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, itwill not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls areentering Hell, let’s look at the different religions that exist in the worldtoday. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of theirreligions, and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we canproject that all souls go to Hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls inHell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volumein Hell. Because Boyle’s Law states that in order for the temperature andpressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand as souls areadded. This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enterHell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hellbreaks loose.
2. Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of soulsin Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. Sowhich is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Ms. Teresa Banyan during my Freshmanyear�”�that it would be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you.:–and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexualrelations with her, then #2 cannot be true; and thus I am sure that Hell isexothermic and will not freeze.
The student Received the only “A” given.

Here’s a little story from a ‘cam girl’ called Ashley. She’s pretty hot andI’d let smoke my pole if she was actually still in this country. She’s from thesame state as me, so I’m sure I’ll eventually get into her pants.

How To Get in a Girl’s Pants

I’m Ashley and I’m not easy. I don’t think that’s why Jack asked me to writethis article, but it’s probably important to know since this is me writing abouthow to get into a girl’s pants. Anyway I was told that I wasn’t easy by a prettygood source and I trust his judgment. Naturally I’d have my panties off for Jackin a second, but who wouldn’t? Seriously.
Something important to remember is that most girls are just as superficial asguys are, so seriously – if you’re completely busted, your options are probablylimited. I have problems with kissing ugly guys – meaning I can’t bring myselfto do it. And if I can’t kiss a guy, I’m probably not going to fuck him. Myadvice would be to focus on girls that are at about the same level ofattractiveness that you are; they’re already used to what they’re seeing in themirror every day and probably won’t have a problem with you.
Once you’ve proven yourself able to actually get a reasonably attractive girlthat you want to have sex with, the best thing to do is not turn into a completejackass. That point should be obvious, but you’d be surprised at how many guysfuck that one up. Bear in mind that despite what you may think, her sole purposein life is not to service you. If she says that she doesn’t want to have sex,don’t say “please” because it probably won’t change her mind and don’tthrow a temper tantrum. Girls find that a serious turnoff. However, if she’sjust a cocktease, she doesn’t deserve your respect anyway and you should dropher off on the nearest street corner. That’s just my opinion.
It’s also important to remember that being sensitive isn’t as important as onewould think. I personally tend to think any guy I meet who is overly sensitive,attentive, and all that stuff that’s supposed to characterize the perfect male,is gay. So don’t fall into the sensitivity trap. I mean you should complimenther and treat her well absolutely – but empathizing with absolutely every aspectof her feminine issues sets off gaydar in almost any girl’s mind.
So basically, to recap – don’t waste your time on cockteases or girls that areclearly too good for you, don’t turn into a complete jackass, and don’t act gay- those things basically guarantee you’ll be sleeping alone. I’m done.

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Clickhere for more girls getting fucked on the Bang Boat!

Clickhere for more girls getting fucked on the Bang Boat!

Well, that’s all for another couple of days.Thanks for reading!! Ohyeah, don’t forget to check out Teen Rave where the hottest teens pose in thebest galleries!