– Friday March 28 – 2003 :: I Want a New Girlfriend

Weekly Round Up (5:00PM EST) Jack
Another weekend is here, and it’s time for your porn filled post to tide you over until Monday. This has been a good week for me, and the weekend is looking just as good. First off I didn’t get my girlfriend pregnant this whole month while she was off birth control. You see, she’s on that shot thing, and she forgot to get it renewed last month. Seeing as how I’m a stubborn asshole, I didn’t really want to use condoms, so for this month we were kind of taking chances. I’m a big fan of the ‘pull out and pray’ method, and it worked in our favor this time. So now she’s back on the shot, and I’m back into having worry free unprotected sex. Of course anything could happen, but at least we’re somewhat safe now. Who knows what could happen though.

So it’s been almost a week since the war started and today I got one of the best emails I’ve gotten because of this site. Every once in awhile I get an email that makes me glad I’m a porn deliverer, and gives me a little more motivation to keep doing this. Hopefully I’ll be able to post it later on today, I just want to get the OK before I start giving out people’s ranks and names. I can tell you it made my day a little bit better.

These last couple of months I’ve kind of shyed away from the whole E/N scene. I’m not sure if it’s just because I’ve been lazy to write, or if it’s just because I have nothing to write about. Sure I still check out Internet Gossip, which seems to have been replaced by Cam Mafia. And I also don’t mind looking at Kissable.org because she’s very easy on the eyes. But other than that I don’t really check out too many other sites. But I’m going to try and be a little more sociable and visit some of these other ones that have popped up. If you have a new site and want me to check it out, send over and email and maybe if you’re good enough I’ll link it up over here.

Tonight I think I’m going to go see Dreamcatcher even though it’s been kind of shitty reviews. I like most Stephen King movies, and it’ll be a good waste of a couple of hours. Plus it’s got the star of Mallrats, Jason Lee, in it. You can’t go wrong when you’ve got Brody and some ‘shit weasels’. I’ll let you know if it’s decent or not.

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I Want a New Girlfriend – Friday May 9

In the VIP Room (7:00PM EST) Jack

Check out what goes on in those Celeb VIP Rooms!

Fuck Fuck Fuck (5:00PM EST) Jack
Well, all good things have to come to an end sometimes. On the eve ofour anniversary, me and Monica finally broke up for good. I guess I should haveseen it coming, but maybe I was just blind to it because of the great sex. Ohwell, I’m sure there’s plenty of other girls who are willing to spread theirlegs for me. I’m not going to dwell on it for too long, so this is probably theonly emotional moment you’re going to get.

In other news, I’ve got one more final beforeI’m finally done with classes for the semester. I tell you I can’t wait forsummer to come. It’s been a long fucking winter and it’s about time to see moregirls at the gym, at the pool, and on my bed. Of course a couple of buddies ofmine are already living the dream as you can see in these pictures.

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Two older men are sitting on a park benchtalking and one of them asks the other about his sex life. The man answers thathe has an excellent sex life and is still very active.
The other man confesses that his sexual appetite has greatly diminished with oldage so he asks the other man if he has any secrets for staying sexually vital.
“Well,” answered the man, “I eat rye bread everyday. That is mysecret. If you just eat rye bread, your sex life will improvedramatically.”
The other man decides to follow this advice and finds a bakery nearby. He tellsthe clerk behind the counter that he wants all of the loaves of rye bread thatthey have in stock.
The clerk then asks the man, “do you want whole loaves or do you want us toslice them?”
The man looks puzzled and asks the clerk, “what is the difference?”
The clerk responds, “Well when it’s sliced, it gets harder faster.”
To which the man responded, “How come everyone knew about this butme?”

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Doesn’t that dude fucking thebroad look a little like Al Snow?? I wonder if the wrestling career didn’t payoff and now he’s using his celebrity status to fuck broads he meets on thestreets?

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A kid comes home from school and says to hismom, “Mom I’ve got a problem.”
She says “Tell me.” He tells her that the boys at school are using 2words he doesn’t understand. She asks him what they are.
He says “well, pussy and bitch”.
She says “Oh That’s no big deal, pussy is a cat like our little Mittens,and bitch is a female dog like our Sandy.”
He thanks her and goes to visit dad in the workshop in the basement. He says tohis dad, “Dad the boys at school are using words I don’t know, and I askedmom and I don’t think she told me the exact meaning.
Dad says “Son, I told you never to go to mom with these matters, she canthandle them. What are the words?”
He tells him…pussy and bitch.
Dad says “OK” and pulls a Playboy down from the shelf, takes a markerand circles the pubic area of the centerfold and says, “son, everythinginside this circle, is pussy.”
“OK dad, so what’s a bitch?”
“Son” he says, “everything outside that circle.”