I Want a New Girlfriend – Monday July 14

I Want a New Girlfriend – Monday July 14

PornoPalooza! (12:00AM EST) Jack
Well, after taking the weekend off I’m back and chock full of porn! I’m starting to make some more quality updates, instead of the BS I’ve been posting lately. So more only picture updates, it’s time to get back to the IWANG stories you all love.

This weekend was another wicked nice one and I spent as much of it as I could outside. I went camping last night with the woman, and it was a total blast. There’s nothing like fucking your girlfriend doggie style under the moon and stars. I recommend it for everyone, but just make sure you bring a couple of blankets cause those rocks can be killer on your knees.

Speaking of the girlfriend, things have been pretty damn good lately. This is the longest I’ve been in a relationship and although I was nervous about the sex getting stale, I can honestly say that it’s as good as it was on day one. Of course bringing another girl into the bedroom can really help! That’s right your good buddy Jack fucked TWO girls this weekend. Right now I live in a pretty big building and I rent out the furnished basement. Like Mike, I only rent out the space to hot broads. The last girl that was living here was a fucking prude, so I didn’t get to sample her fine poonani, but this girl that moved in was totally open to it. Luckily Monica was game, and on Friday night we all partook in a great sexual experience.

It started out how most threesomes normally start, lots of fucking booze. I brought my favorite bottle of Tequila and got the girls pretty drunk. Once everyone was feeling comfortable I got the girls making out, and it all went good from there. I wont tell all the details because they both know about the site now, but I’m pretty sure everyone was extremely satisfied in the end. Maybe they’ll leave some comments and tell me how they really felt about it. I only hope that there’s no weirdness now, because the last thing I need is some psycho broad living in my basement. I’ll keep you posted though.

I almost forgot to post these videos that I took while I was on vacation. Here’s some hot naked broads that got caught on IWANG video!

For more girls caught on cam check out Girls Get Crazy!!

A woman is in a coma. Nurses are in her room giving her a sponge bath. One of them is washing her “private area” and notices that there is a response on the monitor when he touches her.

They go to her husband and explain what happened, telling him, “Crazy as this sounds, maybe a little oral sex will do the trick and bring her out of the coma.” The husband is skeptical, but they assure him that they’ll close the curtains for privacy. Besides it’s worth a try.

The hubby finally agrees and goes into his wife’s room. After a few minutes the woman’s monitor flat-lines… no pulse… no heart rate. The nurses run into the room. The husband is standing there, pulling up his pants and says, “I think she choked.”

A plane with 4 passengers is about to crash, but has only three parachutes. The first passenger says “I’m Kobe Bryant, the best NBA basketball player. The Lakers need me. I can’t afford to die.” So he takes the first parachute and leaves the plane.

The second passenger, Hillary Clinton, says “I am the wife of the former President of the United States. I am the most ambitious woman in the world. I am also a New York Senator, a potential future President, and above all, the smartest woman in America.” She grabs the second parachute and leaves the plane.

The third passenger, The Rev. Billy Graham, says to the fourth passenger, a 10 year old school boy, “I am old and I don’t have many years left. As a Christian I will sacrifice my life and let you have the last parachute.”

The boy says, “It’s okay. There is still a parachute left for you. America’s smartest woman took my school backpack.”

Wanna see the funniest movie ever?? Here’s some chinese ping pong match with Matrix special effects!

So right now I’m watching TV and a commercial came out about 5 queers. I guess they’re going across the county and “making over” straight guys for their girlfriends. This is soo fucking gay, no pun intended. If my girlfriend ever told me that 5 fags were going to come into my apartment and give me a make over, I’d first tell her to kiss my ass, and then bend over so I kick her ass out of my place. It’s common knowledge that guys are supposed to be messy and not color coordinated. I give this show about two episodes before some guy kicks the shit out of these stool pushers.

Three couples were married and stayed at the same hotel for their honeymoons, where they were all taken care of by Dave the Bellboy.

The first man married a nurse.

Dave showed them to their room and thought to himself, “What a lucky guy. Nurses are known to be hot to trot.”.

The second man married a telephone operator.

Dave showed them to their room and thought to himself,” Wow, he’s a lucky one. Telephone operators have sexy voices and once you pop that top button…Va-voom.”.

The third man married a school teacher.

Dave showed them to their room and thought to himself, “Poor guy, she’s pretty but teachers are just too frigid.”.

The next morning, Dave reported to work at 5:30 in the morning. He expected only the teacher’s husband to call for breakfast any minute and the other two would call much later in the day.

At 6:00 a.m. the phone rang. It was the nurse’s husband wanting breakfast. The nurse’s husband opened the door and Dave stepped back in shock. The man’s pajamas were still pressed and his hair nicely combed.

Dave asked, “What happened sir? You married a nurse.

The man sourly replies, “Son, don’t ever marry a nurse. All I heard last night was her nagging voice saying, ” You’re not sanitary, you’re not sanitary.”

At 6:30 a.m., the phone rang again.

The telephone operator’s husband called for breakfast. Dave brought it as fast as possible hoping for the best. The man opened the door and Dave stepped back in shock. The man’s hair and pajamas were properly combed and pressed.

Dave asked,” What happened? Telephone operators are supposed to be as sexy as their voices.”

The man sourly replies “Son, don’t ever marry a telephone operator. All I heard last night was her a nasal voice saying, “You’re three minutes are up, your three minutes are up.”

Dave went back down to the desk, just knowing the teachers husband would be calling any minute.

Finally at 4:30 p.m., the teacher’s husband called for breakfast.

Dave can’t believe it but quickly took the breakfast to the couples room. The man opened the door and Dave took a step back in shock. The man was wearing only his boxers, his hair was a mess, and he had scratch marks on his chest, arms and legs.

Joe fearing the worst, asked ” What happened to you? Did you have a fight?”

The man smiled and happily replied, “No. Son, when you marry, be sure to marry a school teacher. All I heard last night was her sexy smooth voice saying “We are going to do this over and over, until we get right.”

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