– Monday June 23 – 2003 :: I Want a New Girlfriend

– Monday June 23 – 2003 :: I Want a New Girlfriend

Quick Update (9:01PM EST) Jack
Just a quick little update… The thing I hate the most is when peopleare soo fucking lazy that they ask me to send them pics and vids. So this oneguy pissed me off royally. I’m hoping that you people out there will just causehim a little grief, instant message him or email him or something. Just make itso he’s as pissed off as me. The person who sends in the best email or theinstant message conversation gets a prize!

Email mlbskuzz10@aol.com

InstantMessage this Prick

Monday Madness (9:00PM EST) Jack�

AdamSandler Marries Hot Ass Girlfriend
��� LOS ANGELES (Reuters) – Comedic actor Adam Sandler (news)has gone from “Punch-Drunk Love” to holy matrimony. The 36-year-oldperformer over the weekend married his longtime girlfriend, model/actress JackieTitone (news),in a private ceremony, his publicist said on Monday.

PamAnderson Becomes an Animated Stripper (As Opposed to being a live stripper)
��� Former “Baywatch” beauty Pamela Anderson ismaking her animation debut as a superhero who dances in a strip club, but shedemanded and received a no-nudity clause for her cartoon alter ego.

HulkKicks Ass at the Box Office
��� LOS ANGELES (Hollywood Reporter) – Mild-manneredBruce Banner unleashed his rage at the box office this weekend in North Americaand transformed his incredible green fury into an estimated $62.6 million worthof greenbacks for Universal’s “The Hulk” as the picture leaped intothe top spot on its debut.

Gota news story send it in here!

So this was a pretty good weekend over at myplace. I had some people over on Friday and although we did get a little rowdythe night ended good and no one got killed or anything. I ended up passed out onmy couch, having no idea how I got there… But at least I wasn’t covered inpaint, and no pictures of some one’s ball sac on my head have surfaced on theinternet. All in all it was a good night, and I’m pretty sure I got to seeMonica make out with another chick at some point. Next time when I’m a littlemore sober I’ll have to get into that action and make myself a nice littlelesbian porn site. Until that day, you’re just stuck with the crap I post here.

How was every one else’s weekend. I hope youall got fucked up on Beerand Shotsany maybe even got a little poontang. This weekend coming upis looking like it’s going to be another great one, as I go on Vacation for anentire fucking week! It’s going to be all about surfing, getting laid, gettingdrunk, and eating some fine ass food. Of course that means no update for theweek, but I’ll post a TON on porn on Thursday before I take off. Here’s just asmall sample…

Ilove the girls that fuck intheVIP rooms!

WantAria?! Then check out Porn Stud Search, where you could win the chanceto fuck her silly!

This elderly lady went to thedoctor for a checkup. Everything checked out fine. The old lady pulled thedoctor to the side and said, “Doctor, I haven’t had sex for years now, andI was wondering how I can increase my husband’s sex drive.”
The doctor smiled and said, “Have you tried to give him Viagra?”
The lady frowned. “Doctor, I can’t even get him to take aspirin when he hasa headache,” she claimed.
“Well,” the doctor continued, “let me suggest something. Crushthe Viagra into a powder. When you are giving him coffee, stir it into thecoffee and serve it. He won’t notice a thing.”
The old lady was delighted. She left the doctor’s office quickly.
Weeks later the old lady returned. She was frowning and the doctor asked herwhat was wrong. She shook her head.
“How did it go?” the doctor asked.
“Terribly, doctor, terribly.”
“Did it not work?”
“Yes,” the old lady said, “It worked. I did as you said and hegot up and ripped his clothes off right then and there and we made mad love onthe table. It was the best sex that I’d had in 25 years.”
“Then what is the problem, ma’am?”
“Well,” she said. “I can’t ever show my face in McDonald’sagain.”

I’ve always had kind of a fetishfor girls in cheerleader outfits and schoolgirl uniforms… Here’s just a smalllittle gallery of a hot broad showing off EVERYTHING.

A fifth grade teacher is told she must teachsex education to her class. She decides to use a math technique to teach thesubject, and thinks flash cards will work well.
The next day in class, she holds up the first flash card, a picture of a breast,and asks, “Does anyone know what this is?”
Sandy responds, “I know, I know! It’s a picture of a breast and my Mommy
has two of them!”
The teacher says, “Very good Sandy, you get a star for the exercise.”
The teacher grabs the next card and holds it up. It’s a picture of a penis. Sheasks, “Does anyone know what this is?”
Little Johnny says, “I know, I know! It’s a penis and my Daddy has two ofthem!!”
The teacher says, “Well, Johnny, it is a penis, but your daddy can’t havetwo of them.
Johnny says, “Sure he does, he’s got a little one he pees out of and agreat big one he brushes Mommy’s teeth with!”

When I come home from work I wantmy girlfriend to be naked and in the tub getting all nice and clean for me.After a long day’s working posting porno the last thing I want is a stinkygirlfriend. Check out these pics for exactly what I’m talking about.

– Brunette- Brunette – Brunette- Brunette – Brunette-

– Brunette- Brunette – Brunette- Brunette – Brunette-

Here’s some funny pics that don’treally fall into any one category.

– Women’sDream – FemaleDrivers – ConfusedBlondes – Do ILook Fat in this Thong? –

Gota funny picture? Send it in here!

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