The Condom Factory :: I Want a New Girlfriend

Ok guys face it, in this day and age we need to give the little guy a hat. It’s not safe to pick up some bar slut and screw her and send her on her way anymore. She can leave little lingering traces of her presence with you. And that’s something we don’t need our girlfriends finding out about. You don’t really want to give your girl herpes, so check out this list and let me know what you think.

Buying condoms can be a pretty nerve racking experience. First off you don’t want to have to ask the pharmacist which brand to buy, because first he’s probably 90, and second he probably has no more clue about the best kinds either. So here are a few tips.

The Free Condoms From the Bar

These are the WORST condoms you could find anywhere. They are ripped half of the time before you even open them, and if they’re not, they usually rip when it comes down to the big act. Stay away from these at all costs. You’ll end up the daddy of some bar slut’s kid.

The Non Lubricated Ones

I’ve used these once or twice, and I was not impressed at all. I guess you’re supposed to use them mainly for oral sex, but I don’t see the point. Some people may be allergic to the spermicide that other condoms use so these could be an option. One thing you do have to be careful of is there is no back-up if the condom breaks or falls off. Try to be extra careful with these types of condoms.

The Large Condoms

Buy these condoms if you think you need them. Don’t be a macho man though and buy them cause you think you got a big johnson. Condoms should be secure, but they also shouldn’t be so stretched out that they’re going to snap. You can always try a couple of different brands to see which ones fit you the best.

The Small Condoms

On the other end of the spectrum if you’re little johnson is falling out of the regular condoms try some of these. Don’t think that you’re any less of a man because you buy the training condoms, just remember it’s not the size the anvil, it’s how you move it…. or something like that. Ladies you might have to be the one to bring this up, no man is going to voluntarily admit that his package is not big enough for the condom.

Ribbed For Her Pleasure

As far as novelty condoms go, this is probably the best one there is. It has little bumps on the condom designed to give the girl a little bit more pleasure. Also in this category are the flavor condoms. I really think that they are a waste of time. If any girl makes you wear a condom while she is giving you head, it’s time to lose her. Or next time she wants to get eaten out, put a piece of saran wrap over her pussy and see how she likes it…….

I myself am not a big fan on condoms. Yes they are required for any type of casual sex, but if I’m in a monogamous relationship there is no way I’ll wear one. I hate the way they feel, and the way they lessen the feel. Ladies go with the pill!!!

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